THE FALLEN CLERIC

From an email I sent to my church today…

In the last few weeks I have done a lot of thinking about the church. Not merely this church, but the whole North American church. I have come to some realizations more clearly than ever before and I’m going to tell you what they are, but please prepare for some honesty and frankness.

It’s time to just say it.  Folks, to me, the church stinks. Church-as-usual I mean.  I’m not a fan of boring sermons, of music that sounds like you’ve blasted a hundred years back in time, of stuffy suits, of marquis with cheesy slogans on them out by the road, and of having to mind your p’s and q’s so much that you feel like a fake anytime you even come close to acting like the person you really are. I’m not a fan of feeling like I have to use spiritual language so that people will know I’m seeking God.

The Lord told me this is what we should do, instead of “Let’s do this.”
God’s vision for Wildwind involves… instead of “Here’s my vision.”
How’s your spiritual life, instead of “Tell me how you are doing, really.”

The fact is I don’t, and never have, cared about the “code language” that helps one Christian identify another. I have noticed that most people at Wildwind don’t seem to either, and that’s one reason why I love our church. Mostly, I’m not a fan of churches where people who are struggling can’t be honest about that. I’m thankful that I pastor and attend a church where I can be honest about things, even as pastor, and still be seen as someone who wants God in my life.

Wildwind will continue to be about what it has always been about. Honesty. The pursuit of a godly life together in an honest way. Honesty says I don’t know all, or even most, of the answers just because I’m the pastor. (In fact, as pastor I am simply the “chief seeker.”) Honesty admits that the lives we all lead publicly are usually the cleaned-up and pressed versions of the ones we live in private. Honesty admits that our actions and language are usually different Monday through Saturday than they are on Sundays and understands that we’re neither any better, nor any worse, than the person sitting next to us. Instead of trying to muster up spiritual feelings on Sunday mornings before we get to church, honesty understands that staggering into church broken sometimes is what it’s all about — after all, we just might find healing there. Wildwind’s core value that covers honesty, is authenticity.

I can’t tell you how many times I have staggered into church broken in the past few months. Even so I have found, and continue to find, healing at Wildwind Church. And it is not a building that is healing me, but the people who are Wildwind. It is you who listen to me tell you sometimes that I am lost, and yet are willing to continue to follow; you who know I am not who I wish I could be, yet have faith that somehow — like you — I’m okay with God; you who walk this road with me in small group, through encouraging notes you send to me, through continuing to believe I have something worthwhile to say to you, even though you know I’m not always a genius at managing my own life.

Let Wildwind always be that place. After all, I know if I can find not judgment but healing and grace there, it is available to everyone. I’m the one up front, therefore I’m the easiest target — the one easiest to hit with stones of judgment, and the one held to the highest standard (as it should be). And yet I have received not one single email or call from someone sitting in judgment of my recent struggles. Please know that no matter where you are, what you are struggling with, or how messed up you feel inside, there is grace for you. I have been on the receiving end of that grace, and I know there is plenty left for all who need it.

Originally posted 2007-05-02 02:41:00. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

Recently a friend said that the problem with our society is that we’re trying to combine the rationalist teachings of the Greco-Roman world with the teachings of Jesus. Though I appreciate the spirit of what he’s saying (the schizophrenia in our society when it comes to politics and religion) I do not believe the teachings of Jesus are irrational. In fact I believe they are more rational than many other so-called rational ideas.

Jesus taught non-violence, for example. This is certainly counter-intuitive, but that does not mean irrational. Jesus realized that to strike someone in retaliation will just provoke another retaliation from them, which of course is precisely what happens. (continue reading…)

Originally posted 2008-12-17 19:55:00. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

I have always desired to be on a continual journey of growth in my life. But I’m sick of finding at the end of every year that my various ideas to lead toward growth haven’t led to very much. This happens because I get ideas, get excited about them, and then forget them. This time I’m writing it down. Here’s the plan for this year, September 2007-August 2008.

Abandon Annually
Oct. 4-6 – Catalyst Conference in Atlanta, GA
Nov. 16/17 – Good Sense training at Willow Creek
Jan. 7-12; 14-19 — Take classes in Indianapolis
Feb. – Anniversary getaway (2/22-24 or 2/29-3/2)
March 28-30 – A Weekend To Remember marriage conference
June/July – Family trip to DC
Aug. 7-9 – Leadership Summit at Willow Creek

Measure Monthly
Church consultation meetings with Ralph Funk, 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. monthly
Spend remainder of day at The Hills evaluating myself and the church each month

Withdraw Weekly
Monday – Day off. Do at least one activity specifically for me.
Weekly fast day
Weekly refocusing and accountability with Brent at staff meeting

Divert daily
Daily PSD (personal and spiritual disciplines)
Physical fitness five days/week (cardio and basic strength training)
Read one book every other week, which will require daily time set aside for reading

Originally posted 2007-09-19 19:32:00. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

Leadership gets really tough sometimes, no question about it. So why do we do it? Why do leaders lead? Because people need leadership. They need leaders who will sacrifice for them, who are willing to have their integrity and commitment and character questioned, who will refuse to share with them information that could hurt them or someone else, who will not act superior and play other religious games, and who will, when necessary, take their lumps when a tough call needs to be made. If leaders gave up when it got tough, we’d be doing exactly what we are trying to teach our people not to do. How will they stick it out if we turn tail and run when the heat is on? How could we ever expect them to? What right do we even have to ask someone to do what we are not willing to do ourselves?

Once in a while we see growth. Actually a great deal more often than once in a while. Someone apologizes and takes responsibility for something they did or said that was hurtful or destructive. Someone buries the hatchet and decides to keep having faith in their leader(s) even when they can’t see the full path. Someone has a difficult conversation and decides to make a relationship work when it would be far easier to run. Someone chooses not to give in to anger and frustration and suspicion, which are so rampant in society today. Indeed it often seems that the only ones considered intelligent are the cynical ones.

As for me, I will not be a cynic. Not about my people — I will have faith in their potential to grow, that who they are now is not who they will be. Not about my church — I will have faith in its place in the community. Not about my co-leaders — I will have faith in their loyalty to God, to the church, and to me. Not about my myself — I will take responsibility for mistakes I make and sins I commit, but will not question my own motives for leading. And not about God — I refuse to accept that God will not bring good things out of my pain (and the pain of others), that God does not have better things in store for us than what we see now. I will not embrace the way of the cynic who is always looking for places to exploit people, searching out weaknesses in them so as to to expose them to humiliation, demanding that people be perfect and then ridiculing those who succumb to that demand and actually try to be. I won’t play that game and will willingly frustrate and disappoint all who try to make me.

I believe in the power of good leadership to build excellent, albeit imperfect, churches that can make the most of the God-given potential of their people. I believe the local church is the hope of the world, and therefore the hope of each of us individually. I believe in the everyday people who commit to build the local church with their time and money and energies and efforts. I believe in their resiliency, in their character, and in their will to be better, even in times when they are angry and hurting and doubtful of their leaders and aren’t so sure they’re all that into the growth thing. I will not give up on them, even in times when some of them may give up on me. And on themselves.

When church leaders are called and gifted to lead, and they do that job prayerfully and with skill and dedication and courage and wisdom and love, churches grow up under them and around them that flourish. The result is lives, families, and communities that are changed for the better. I cannot imagine that a time would come, despite the hardships of ministry, where I wouldn’t want a front row seat to that. The harder things get, the less I would think about giving up. Wildwind has come a long way, and I’ve always been in. We have a long way to go, and things have not always been easy. I’m still in.

I’m still in.

Originally posted 2007-09-02 22:56:00. Republished by Blog Post Promoter

What I’m about to write here is for my own self-indulgent fun. I’ll enjoy parsing through it and if anybody else would find it interesting, much the better.

I was thinking about the 60′s revolution and how it was a response to the influence of Christ. It was a a movement the baby boomers originated in direct response to the conceptions of God, church, Christ, and family held by their parents.

The foundation of that movement was a questioning of propositional truth. Jesus said “I am the way, the truth, and the life.” The hippies questioned whether truth itself could even be known and this was the basis for their rebellion against their parents and all that went with it. (continue reading…)

Originally posted 2008-12-18 20:25:00. Republished by Blog Post Promoter